A Homemaker’s Diary

Let Your Child Roam

Taurus vs Sagittarius

Your Sagittarius child is energetic and curious by nature and wants nothing more than to get out and roam the wide world. From an early age, he loves being outdoors regardless of the temperature or weather conditions, and he adores travel, even if it’s just a trip to the grocery store in a nearby town. But a camping trip or a visit to another country would be even better!

You appreciate your little one’s innate honesty, his sense of morality, and his happy heart, and while you’re certainly up for life’s many pleasures, you’re just not quite as adventurous as your child. Stable and grounded, you prefer the comforts of home to breaking away from what’s familiar to stretch limits and investigate ideas. But your Sagittarius child thrives on adventure, so give him his freedom and allow him to explore the boundaries of his existence.

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Thrill-Seekers

Aries vs Sagittarius

You and your Sagittarius child make a great team. You’re both spirited types, always on the go, seeking the next adventure. You understand your little Sag’s need for freedom very well, and you gladly let him establish his independence. You’re even proud of the way he tests his boundaries. Besides, you’ve got your own trailblazing to do! Your best times together are spent out of the house, traveling, mountain-biking, or pursuing any other activity that combines physical exertion with thrills to keep you both engaged.

Remember, too, that your Sagittarius child needs ample mental stimulation as well as physical exertion. Take him to the library and the museum often, as fodder for his expansive, curious mind. Best of all, the fact that you’re both easily distracted shouldn’t be an issue. Your little Sag won’t mind following your lead, as long as you’re heading toward the next big experience.

We bought a roll of paper and a bunch of marker pens from IKEA just to start a simple toddler art time with our dear son.

So after the first introduction to the markers, here is the outcome.

The paper has been sprayed to make it acid free before I put them in this crackled frame. I hope it will last long until our son is big enough to appreciate his artwork that he did when he was 14 month old..heh!

Oh, if you notice the smiley character in blue with teeth protruding, Hubby drew that..what a way to become a child again!

I was flipping through the book on sleep solution - The Sleepeasy Solution by Jennifer Waldburger and Jill Spivack.

There is one chapter on developmental issues -2 to 5 years specifically on caving in to demands. I find it useful and something very important for me to remember once my son reach that age period.

For parents who have had a lot of disappointment or neglect in their own childhoods, setting limits with their children can feel especially difficult. It can be hard to distinguish what is appropriate limit setting from neglect or abandonment.

Even now when my son was not yet reaching the terrible two extreme phase, I find it difficult to NOT to cave in to his demands. (Gosh, when he cries his eyes out, wiggling on the floor, throwing tantrums, I would do anything just to make it stop..isk isk!) But I feel this is something I have to do, for the sake of his own good later on.

When you need to hold your ground with your child, try to frame the experience in a positive light. Difficult time often offer wonderful opportunities for “teachable moments”.

What is a teachable moment? It is a time when your child is struggling with something that feels difficult but, with your guidance, moves through her experience to gain a skill or learn a necessary life lesson.

As much as you believe that helping your child to get her needs met and feel loved is important, it is also important to understand that her frustration can lead to greater self-esteem as she finds her motivation to learn something new.

Oh God, give me strength and the wisdom to be a great mom as I only want the best for my one and only child!

A few weeks ago, I was bloghopping when I found one blog that has an entry that relates to breastfeeding. I can’t remember the blog URL now but something caught my attention after reading her post. It seems that from the Al Quran verses that she quoted, breastfeeding a child is wajib for a mom, and if she no longer can breastfeed the child up to 2 years, she has to find ibu susuan.

So what about mothers these days who decline to breastfeed and simply feed their child with susu lembu, soymilk and whatnot? Apa hukumnya? isk isk..oh, BTW, below post is taken from some other blog I read last night. Something for me to ponder especially when I find it tough to breastfeed my son at night..huhu..

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Kisah Aminah upah Halimatusaadiah sebagai ibu susuan Nabi Muhammad peringatan penting.

MUNGKINKAH parahnya penyakit sosial di kalangan masyarakat hari ini adalah akibat meminum susu lembu sebagai ganti susu ibu? Mahu atau tidak, inilah hakikat yang perlu dipertimbangkan semula kerana bijak pandai mengatakan, ‘Kita adalah apa yang kita makan’.

Tidak hairanlah manusia yang dilahirkan, tetapi diberi minum susu lembu memiliki ciri seekor lembu atau kata lain, bersifat kebinatangan. Bunyinya keras, tetapi lihatlah masyarakat hari ini yang lebih ganas daripada binatang liar.

Sumbang mahram, rogol dan bunuh, dera dan sebagainya semakin menjadi-jadi. Keganasan sering kali dipilih sebagai kaedah penyelesaian masalah walaupun bagi masalah kecil.

Kebimbangan wujud manusia berciri kebinatangan hari ini disuarakan tokoh agama, Datuk Abu Hassan Din Al Hafiz ketika menyampaikan ceramah sempena Minggu Penyusuan Ibu Sedunia di Pusat Perubatan Universiti Malaya (PPUM), Kuala Lumpur, baru-baru ini.

Beliau berkata, sikap lebih gemar memberi susu lembu kepada bayi berbanding susu ibu menyebabkan masyarakat tidak sedar bahawa mereka sedang menjana manusia ‘Nas’ yang bersifat kebinatangan.

“Manusia terbahagi kepada dua iaitu manusia ‘Nas’ yang tidak menggunakan akal dan suka melakukan kemungkaran dan satu lagi, manusia ‘insan’ yang lebih cenderung kepada kebaikan dan memelihara diri daripada kejahatan.

“Jika diperhatikan, di dalam al-Quran ada 300 ayat yang bermula dengan perkataan ‘Wahai Nas’ yang diturunkan pada zaman jahiliah di Makkah, manakala hanya 82 ayat yang bermula dengan ‘Wahai insan’ yang diturunkan di Madinah. Ini menunjukkan manusia ‘insan’ yang bercirikan kemanusiaan kurang berbanding manusia ‘nas’. Malangnya, manusia hari ini semakin tergolong ke dalam manusia ‘nas’,” katanya yang menyampaikan ceramah bertajuk Menjamin Sahsiah dan Hubungan Sesama Manusia .

Beliau berkata, jenayah yang dilakukan masyarakat hari ini jauh lebih buruk daripada masyarakat jahiliah. Sungguhpun mereka dikenali kerana kekufuran, pada zaman berkenaan tidak ada bapa yang merogol anak sendiri atau membuang bayi yang dilahirkan ke merata tempat.

Tahap ‘kebinatangan’ mereka tidak seteruk masyarakat hari ini kerana mereka tidak memberikan bayi mereka dengan susu binatang lain.

“Peranan ibu yang utama ialah menyusukan anak dengan susu badan seperti yang ditentukan dalam al-Quran. Ini sudah ditunjukkan ibu Nabi Muhammad, Aminah. Selepas lapan bulan Muhammad dilahirkan, susu Aminah kering, tetapi dia tidak terfikirpun untuk menggantikannya dengan susu kambing yang banyak di rumahnya.

“Sebaliknya, Aminah lebih sanggup mengupah Halimatusaadiah untuk menyusukan Muhammad. Melalui kisah Aminah, Allah sengaja hendak mengajar umatnya bahawa wanita lain boleh menyusukan anak orang lain dan mereka digelar ibu susuan yang haram berkahiwn dengan anak dan saudara daripada ibu susuan tadi. Syaratnya, mereka perlu disusukan sehingga kenyang,” katanya.

Ada rahmat terselindung di sebalik persoalan, mengapa susu manusia terlekat pada dada berbanding binatang lain. Ini bagi memudahkan ibu memeluk bayi sewaktu menyusu di mana pelukan ini akan menjana sahsiah si anak dan mengukuhkan ikatan ibu anak.

“Sedangkan haiwan juga ada sifat keibuan dengan sanggup menyusukan anak mereka. Mengapa manusia tidak sanggup, malah tergamak memberikan susu haiwan lain kepada anaknya? Ibu bapa yang memberikan anak susu lembu dan anak membesar menjadi jahat, ibu bapa itu akan dipersalahkan dunia dan akhirat,” katanya.

Anak dilahirkan dalam keadaan fitrah, tetapi kedua ibu bapa menjadikannya Yahudi, Nasrani atau Majusi. Terpulang kepada ibu bapa untuk memilih yang terbaik buat anak mereka.

I have been contemplating to write about my experience raising a year old toddler. After all, what do I know. I only have one child while others have more experiences with more than one child under their care. But then I thought not many people have high need child like mine.

Today, a mother I know asked me what’s a high need child like? And how difficult could it be to raise one. Well, to give you a view of whether it is difficult or not to raise such a child, let’s read through what the characteristics of a high need/spirited child.

If you have the time, read the full descriptions at Dr Sears website : 12 Features Of A High Need Baby.

A summary of the 12 traits as taken from thefussybabysite.com is as follows:

12 Characteristics of High Need Babies

Intense

Make their needs known in a very loud, definitive way. Are passionate about what they want and don’t want, and if you’re not quick to meet their needs, they’ll let you have it. They cry loudly, but the flip side is that they also voice their pleasure loudly.

Hyperactive

In constant motion, may have stiff or tense muscles, seldom quiet or still, and may even resist being held or cuddled. May resist being swaddled or wrapped, and may be difficult to breastfeed because of their constant movement.

Draining

High needs babies wear you down! They definitely keep you on your toes, and may leave little time for you to recharge your batteries. Because they often don’t sleep well, there is no consistent or predictable down time for you, the parent. This can be extremely tiring and frustrating.

Feeds frequently

High needs babies may desire to nurse or bottle feed more frequently. And you may also wish to feed more frequently to pacify your baby. I have heard from many parents that their high needs baby was in the top percentile for weight due to the high frequency of feedings.

Demanding

This is the child that lets you know, very loudly, what he needs. If you don’t get to him right away, he is quick to voice his displeasure. He feels his needs very strongly and knows how to get them met.

Awakens frequently

Sleeps in short stretches and may also have trouble falling asleep.

Unsatisfied

No matter what you do, your baby may still be grumpy, unhappy, or discontent, even if you’ve tried every calming technique you can think of. Dr. Sears encourages parents to realize when they’ve done all they can, and that the rest is up to their baby.

Unpredictable

One day she falls asleep when you rock her, the next she doesn’t. You’re able to calm her by feeding her one night, but the next night she shrieks when you try to feed her. He sleeps through the night for a few days, and then is up 3+ times the next few nights. We jokingly call our little guy manic depressive because he can go from calm and content and smiling one second to red-faced screaming the next.

Super-sensitive

Extremely sensitive to their environment and external stimuli. They are constantly observing the world around them, and prefer to be at home, or in a calm and familiar environment. They may startle easily, and are very sensitive to pain or discomfort.

Can’t put baby down

These babies prefer to be held and in constant motion. They may resist sleeping alone, or being relegated to their stroller or bouncy chair. They prefer human touch and movement. High Needs babies tend to do very well when being ‘worn’ in slings or baby carriers.

Not a self-soother

These are the babies that need help to fall asleep. While other babies may be able to drift peacefully off to sleep in their cribs, some babies need to be gently taught how to relax and fall asleep on their own. This may not come until a little later in infancy.

Separation sensitive

Some babies definitely prefer the company of their primary caregivers. It may be difficult to leave them with babysitters or even have someone else hold them. They are deeply attached to their parents as they know that these are the people who meet their needs.

Well, now you know why I find it so challenging and draining to care for my son. I wonder if there is any other parents with high need child who read this blog. Feel free to leave comment. I would love to know others in the same league.