Parenthood MQ | 26 Jan 2010 03:41 am
An Only Child?
It seems that most people that asked me about whether I am going to have another child gave me some serious weird look whenever I told them that I don’t plan to add any.
What is wrong with having an only child? I was an only child till I was 10 and till now I still don’t understand why my parents have to insist on having additional child in their life when all they ever said and whined is that a child is a burden to parents..sigh!
Was is a family pressure that makes them HAVE to have a son? Is a daughter never good enough as a child? Is it a society norm to keep on getting pregnant and give birth, while you never care of how your child might turn out to be. This world is already so full with ugly, stupid, rotten people and I for once think that my current responsibility of raising a son to be a good person is heavy enough to add another one on my shoulder.
Maybe I think differently from others, but hey, it’s my thought, my choice and my rights. If you want to churn out one child every single year, go ahead. Just don’t give me some stupid remarks or lame excuses on why I should follow your way.
on 26 Jan 2010 at 11:24 am 1.Ady said …
You know what I think - “the reason most people reproduce”. If I post an explanatory comment here or write about it, it’ll sure to become a controversial issue.
Even my Mom advised you to get a child else I will be looking for a new wife. This is the normal way of thinking for many people, worldwide. Unfortunately we’re all human.
Our son is lucky that he is produced out of love and we take care of him 200% on our own. I am proud of you.
on 27 Jan 2010 at 12:22 am 2.Anis said …
Some people just don’t get it. And no, they do not know better just because they have or don’t have children. The concept of having more than one child is overrated. And parents don’t even take care of them hands on. With maids and nurseries available. Kids spent more time with friends than family.
So to #*@! to whatever people say about you not wanting another child. You’re doing great with Ilham. Don’t you ever forget that!!!
p/s: Ady… yg ade 10 anak pun bleh kawen lain.. mana bleh pakai reason utk kawen lain sebab wife xleh bagi zuriat. BS big time!!
on 27 Jan 2010 at 2:04 am 3.MQ said …
Hubby, thanks for being supportive
Anis, that’s another view that parents these days seem to ignore. I just don’t want to mention the fact about maids and nurseries raising their kids for them, nanti issue sensitive pulak kan..ramai yg terasa hati. I just wish they will respect what I feel and think regarding raising an only child, that’s all..
on 27 Jan 2010 at 8:29 am 4.Yinhasni said …
MQ,
berat lagi bahu yang memikul. Zaman semakin mencabar buat ibubapa dan anak2.
Kami cuba yg terbaik dan termampu utk 2 org anak ni.
Anak bukan eksperimen mcm ada org kata klu ada anak 10 klu 1 xjd ada lg 9.Mungkin x bebankan kita tp bebankan masyarakat.
Bersyukur dpt besarkan anak2 dgn tangan sendiri.
on 28 Jan 2010 at 11:01 am 5.fabmama said …
well i guess being the only child can be quite lonely in life, not to mention the pressure he/she gets to be perfect for the sake of parents wish…and being the parents who only has one child can be dull too…apatah lagi bila saudara-mara pon tak ramai…
i said this probably because im married to the only child…
on 28 Jan 2010 at 11:43 am 6.Ady said …
Saudara mara ramai pun tak guna kalau semuanya menyakitkan hati. Bukan lagi kasi senang, lagi kasi susah hidup. Friends you can choose, family you can only disown.
His parents can live without saudara ramai, he will have to learn that too. And he’s lucky we are not the kind of parents that will dictate how he want to run his life, but we will definitely always be by his side and supporting him in happy and sad moments whether or not he made the correct decisions.
As long as he can take care of himself and his future family we’ll be happy.
@Anis: memang BS sebab tu aku cakap. Unfortunately tak boleh deny ramai yang fikir macam tu.
@Yinhasni: betul, anak bukan eksperimen. Semua kena jadi.